Reality

Collisions on an interstate

Feel suddenly far away

When everything you wanted

Is sitting right in front of you

Destiny

Somewhere out there

There is a hope

That someday We will fly away

And never come back

Somewhere out there

There is a curse

That magnifies are sorrows

And all of our hurts

If today was the day that I died

I would not be surprised

But I would wonder my purpose

Because nothing is what I have accomplished

Somewhere out there

Someone listens

To all of our hopes and our fears

But they don't care

Somewhere out there

There is a promise

That everything we did

Led to our own destruction

If today was the day that I died

I would not be surprised

Because destiny is nowhere to be found

And I think random is what we are

Somewhere out there

There is fate

But nothing we do or say

Could bring us there

Somewhere out there

There is a lesson

And my hope is

That every one will listen

If today was the day that I died

I would not be surprised

But everything I hoped

Would be proved wrong

Everything I knew

Would be true

Happy

If someone asked me if I was happy

I would have to say no

It is not that I try not to be happy

But I just don't want to be happy the way most do

I thought I was happy

I am pretty sure I was

But now that I am here right now

In this moment

I am not

They want me to live in the moment

Well here I am living in it

And I feel like shit

I am sorry

I never wanted to hurt anyone with who I am

I never wanted to be a burden

I never wanted to be so hateful

I just thought I would be happy

I just want to get out of the state of my mind

I thought this was over

But it isn't

And I still need to work a few things out

I know somehow I will be happy

I just don't know when or how

This is my soul

As I poor it out

This is who I want to be

The person you see laughing and smiling

That is who I am

I was made to be happy

And I am

When I am around people who can make me laugh

I am happy

Because I want to be happy

But when I am alone

Why am I so prone to anger

And this sadness

This sadness overcomes me

And I don't know why

I don't know how

I thought it was gone

But it is not gone

And I feel so broken

I just don't want to feel this way anymore

And if anyone actually reads a word I write

Thanks but whatever

I am sorry you had to read that